


A Night of Bad Choices and Emotional Conversations with Dad's Not-Boyfriend

by viksherenqueer



Category: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator
Genre: Bonding, POV Third Person, Underage Drinking, amanda also steals a cat, amanda gets stuck at a party, dadsona is unnamed, robert comes to pick her up, robert is adorably nervous, they end up talking about her dad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-31
Updated: 2017-08-31
Packaged: 2018-12-21 23:09:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11954643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/viksherenqueer/pseuds/viksherenqueer
Summary: As they approach the cul-de-sac, Amanda suddenly remembers the most important aspect of spending the night at Robert’s. “Yo, Robert. Dad told me you have a dog. Betsy. Said she’s a huge Pitbull. The scary kind. I want you to know that no dog can strike fear in my heart. All of them are perfect and if Betsy decides it is my time to die, I will accept it. Dogs know best.”





	A Night of Bad Choices and Emotional Conversations with Dad's Not-Boyfriend

**Author's Note:**

> i love amanda so much. i also love robert so much. i want them to bond. i spent all day writing this lmaoo. i have no proofreader so if theres any mistakes just let me know

Amanda had been unsure if the night could get any worse. The drive over here with her “friend” Alex had been pretty awful. He had been nursing his vape like a lifeline, and not only was the humidity messing with her hair, but the overpowering scent of his vape juice was making her feel borderline nauseous. Alex claimed it was maple syrup scented. What a disgrace to maple syrup.

Once they had arrived at the party, things had seemed pretty okay. There was a food table, which quickly became her best friend. The nacho chips were kind of stale and the salsa was weak, but the subpar snack table slowly became more appealing the more Amanda drank. This was it. The big senior blowout before summer ended and everyone headed off to college. And Amanda spent it in the kitchen, eating gross food and drinking what was handed to her. There was this one dude she barely recognized from Mr. Vega’s class, who seemed to take pity on her, and would make rounds to bring her drinks and small talk with her until it got awkward. 

When she finally strayed from the kitchen, a little fuzzy in the head and feeling more relaxed, she made her way over to the Emmas, Grace, and Noah. Things had been rough between them, and she still didn’t totally trust Emma R., but she was sick of not having friends. Emma P. was the first one to acknowledge her. 

“Hey Amanda.” She smiled, and Amanda knew she was drunk. “How’s your summer been?”

“Good,” Amanda replied, taking a swig from a nasty Wine Cooler. “Got a lot of work done on my portfolio. Plus, dad surprised me with a new camera.” She had grinned, finishing the bottle and tossing it to a nearby trashcan. She missed. It was at this point that she knew she was pretty far gone. Her aim was usually flawless. Trash can basketball was her sport, and she would be an Olympic champion. “Well shit.”

Emma P. snorted, which turned into her laughing way harder than she should’ve. And Amanda joined in, laughing to the point of tears. This got the attention of the rest of the group, who seemed a little lost but too wasted to really care enough to ask.

That was when Grace had quickly typed something out in the notes on her phone, bumping Emma P. on the arm and making her read it. Emma P. made a bit of a face, and Amanda had felt a sinking feeling in her gut that it was about her. Grace takes her phone back, typing something else and showing it to Emma P. who then laughed.

“Can I see?”

“You wouldn’t get it,” Grace had shot back without any hesitation, taking her phone back and shoving it in her pocket. Emma P. nods in agreement with Grace, and Amanda had quickly remembered why she didn’t like Grace. 

“A’ight.” Amanda had responded, making some excuse to leave the group. And this is where she currently found herself, locked in the upstairs bathroom. There was a cat sleeping in the sink, which made up for how shitty Amanda was currently feeling about herself. She took a selfie with the beautiful cat, and took a moment to post it as a way of distracting herself.

That was when she realized her bag was gone. Had she put it down somewhere? After a few minutes of backtracking, around the living room, the kitchen, the bathrooms, she was still empty handed. 

“Emma.” She said, moving to tap Emma P. on the back. “Have you seen my purse? The green one?” Emma P. shook her head, giving a quick glance around to see if it was in sight. “Alright, well let me know if you see it.” 

Amanda asks around, regretfully entering the cloud of vape smoke in the dining room to ask Alex if she had left it in his car. They ran outside quickly, but to no avail, it was not there. She finds drink guy from Mr. Vega’s class, but he hasn’t seen it either. 

“God, this fucking sucks.” Amanda groans to the cat she has returned to. “I think somebody actually swiped my bag. I hope they enjoy the seven dollars in change, tampons, and half a pack of chewing gum they got.” Luckily, she had kept her wallet with her ID and debit card on her. Her dad had always made a point of teaching her to keep the important stuff on her person, in case she misplaced (or got robbed, in this case) of her purse. She reaches out, scratching the cat behind it’s ears. It purrs loudly, standing up and arching its back in a stretch. Amanda runs her fingers down its spine, and along the soft, striped tail. 

It was two in the morning, Amanda had no way home, she was far too drunk, her friends sucked, and somebody had stolen her bag. “Why didn’t I stay home?” She asks the cat, who leans over the counter to headbutt her. “Yeah, you’re right. I was supposed to come here to save you from this party.” How illegal was stealing a cat? Amanda attempts to Google it, but her fingers aren’t the most cooperative. ‘how ilegall isit 2 steel a cat’. Yeah, that looks great. Oh, Google understood what she meant. Amanda commends Google for it’s good work for drunk people everywhere. 

After managing to kill another half an hour hiding in a bathtub with the world’s cuddliest cat, Amanda dreads the idea of having to walk home. It would take her at least an hour, and it was a bizarrely cold night for this time of year. Dad had told her earlier if she was going out to take an extra jacket, just in case. She really wished she had taken an extra jacket. Dammit dad with his good advice that Amanda’s rebellious teen heart was too proud to listen to. 

That was when her phone buzzes. A notification from Facebook. Amanda opens the app, seeing that Val Small had left a heart react on her selfie with the cat. After a moment, a comment appeared.

“damn amanda!! loving that top. plus ur eyeliner is on point. (heart eyes emoji)”

Amanda can feel her own cheeks light up. Val thought her eyeliner was good? This was basically the biggest accomplishment of her entire life. She screenshots the comment to fuel her ego later. Val had added her as a friend back at her graduation party, and while they hadn’t talked too much, Amanda had actively liked all her posts. Amanda was a little embarrassed by how enamored she was by the older woman. She was just so cool, and had great taste in clothing, and a really cool job where she made lots of money. Amanda was quickly reminded of a Tumblr post she had seen a long while back. ‘I don’t know if I want to be you, or be with you.’ 

She quickly tosses all those thoughts aside. Val was a lot older than her, and lived far away, and had her life together, and also had a girlfriend. Amanda could fantasize about what a power couple they’d be, though. She snorts, fluffing the cat in front of her. “I’m gonna make you ‘Rito. Like a burrito. But one that purrs. A purrito.” The cat rolls over in her lap, and she hesitantly places a hand on its belly. It doesn’t automatically try to murder her, so she continues to rub at the warm fur there. 

She manages to get her train of thought back on track. How to get home? And also steal this cat? Her dad was definitely asleep, and Alex had been drinking. Walking home sounded miserable, and she really didn’t want to vomit in a Uber driver’s car. Again. 

After a quick glance at her own phone, rereading Val’s name, she remembers that the older woman has a father who lives two houses down from Amanda and her dad. A father who didn’t sleep much from the looks of it and liked to keep her dad out late. She quickly starts to text Robert.

Amanda: yooo u awake???  
Robert: nope  
Robert: sleep texting  
Robert: its my special talent  
Amanda: damn im impressed  
Amanda: i need a favor  
Robert: shoot  
Amanda: i may be partaking in the common illegal teen activity of underage drinkin. i may also be hiding in a bathroom bc someone stole my purse and all my friends suck. and i forgot an extra jacket and its too cold to walk home  
Robert: gimme an address

After Amanda gives him the details, she decides to head outside to wait for Robert. She scoops Rito up in her arms and exits the bathroom. After squeezing past a gaggle of couples who were getting a little too friendly with one another (was that Emma R. and Noah?), she manages her way down the narrow staircase without falling. Nobody bothers her as she leaves the house, stepping out into the cool night air and heading down the sidewalk.

A bus stop is up ahead, the bench calling Amanda’s name. She flops onto it with relief, settling Rito down in her lap and unscrewing the cap of a water bottle she snagged on the way out of the party. A quick sip tells her it is indeed not water. Well, at least vodka would keep her warm. 

Twenty minutes and half the water bottle are gone before Amanda spots Robert’s pickup truck turning the corner. She waves him down, and he pulls to a stop by the sidewalk. It takes all of Amanda’s focus, but she manages to stand up and open the car door without falling flat on her face. She puts the cat in first, and Robert just sort of glances at it. “Oh yeah. I may have uh, maybe I’m like. Not just underage drinking. How illegal is it to steal a cat?”

Robert’s brows raise ever so slightly as Amanda slides into the car, closing the door and buckling herself in. “Well. It’s only illegal if you get caught. I’d say keep it secret for a month or so before making an announcement of finding and adopting a stray cat you found.”

“I already posted a pic of me with the cat.” Amanda admits, feeling a little disappointed in her cat stealing abilities. “Val commented on it. Said my eyeliner looked great.” Disappointment is suddenly out the window, and Amanda is swimming in infatuation. 

“Val likes cats. I’m sure I could convince her to play witness protection for the little fluffball until the heat settles and the feds get off your ass.” Robert reaches over, moving a hand along the cat’s back slowly. It’s weird watching Badass McGee with this cute little cat. Rito then decides to ditch Amanda to get in Robert’s lap. Amanda takes another sip of vodka and gives Rito the side eye.

“Any clue who stole your bag? Because I’m not opposed to breaking and entering if you have an address. I’m also not opposed to egging a teenager’s house.” Robert starts up the truck, making a U-turn that’s probably illegal before heading back down the road. 

“Not a clue.” Amanda mutters, wedging the water bottle between her thighs and taking out her phone. “S’not a big deal, anyway. Pops always told me to keep my important stuff on my person. All that was in my purse was like… Gum, a few bucks, some pepper spray, and… Shit.” Amanda huffs suddenly, smacking a hand against her forehead. “My house keys. I have no way back into my house when we get there.”

“Your dad doesn’t keep a spare under the mat or somethin’?” Robert inquires, staring out the windshield as it begins to pour rain. Amanda is suddenly doubly happy she didn’t try to walk home.

“Usually he does but like. Like two weeks ago dad and I were hanging out by a pond with Brian and Daisy and I may have jumped in with most of my clothes on. And lost my key. So, dad told me to use the one under the mat for the time being. And… I lost that one too.” Amanda makes a face, feeling kind of embarrassed. It suddenly seems like trying to not wake her father up was a pretty pointless task. At least he wasn’t here to handle the brunt of her drunkness. “One of dad’s bedroom windows has a broken lock, but I’d definitely wake him up trying to climb in there.”

“Is he not supposed to know about this?” Robert inquires, and Amanda gives him a look. He does not talk enough. Dad was a rambler. So was she. Robert was giving her such short answers that felt a little thrown off balance.

“Eh, I told him I was going out tonight and not to wait up for me. He had a long day, though. He was exhausted when I left, and I’d rather not wake him up since he’ll probably just get up to fuss over me and not go back to sleep.” Amanda hiccups a bit, taking a closer look of the selfie of her with Rito on her phone. Her eyeliner really is on point. 

“You can sleep at my place, if you want.” Robert finally says after a moment of silence. Rito is still curled up in his lap, purring. “Uh, is that a creepy suggestion? I don’t really know what the proper etiquette for this is.” Amanda suddenly understands why Robert doesn’t talk much. He sounds nervous. It’s pretty well hidden in his tone, but if there was anything Amanda learned from her dad, it was how to realize when somebody is just as nervous as you are.

“No, it’s not really creepy. You’re my dad’s friend after all, and you only live a house down from us.” The suggestion was sort of weird if taken out of context. Much older dude asking young drunk girl to stay at his place for the night. But it was Robert, who dad has been spending a lot of time with lately. Amanda would trust her dad’s judgement and accept Robert as probably not a serial killer. Probably. 

The rest of the drive consists of Robert turning on the radio, playing some old rock song cluttered with the static of a bad connection. Amanda examines the inside of his truck, noting how old it was. The stickers stuck to the glove compartment were faded and peeling at the edges, and the hula girl on the dashboard didn’t really sway anymore. It was more of a broken, sudden jerk every few seconds. There was a photo tucked into the bottom of the windshield, where it met the dashboard. It was faded, and a little crumpled. The man in the photo was definitely Robert, but… Different. Not greying, clean shaved, less lines in his face and less darkness in his eyes. Next to him was a young girl, maybe ten or eleven, with a headful of dark curls. She looks happy. They both do. It’s a really nice photo.

As they approach the cul-de-sac, Amanda suddenly remembers the most important aspect of spending the night at Robert’s. “Yo, Robert. Dad told me you have a dog. Betsy. Said she’s a huge Pitbull. The scary kind. I want you to know that no dog can strike fear in my heart. All of them are perfect and if Betsy decides it is my time to die, I will accept it. Dogs know best.”

Robert is… Actually grinning a little bit. Amanda isn’t sure what to do with that. “Damn, you caught me. Betsy actually is a bloodthirsty predator who needs human flesh to survive. This was all part of my plot. I stole your purse so you would have to come home with me. Betsy is excited to meet and eat you.”

“I am ready.” Amanda says as they pull into the driveway, stretching her arms in front of her. Robert pulls his wallet out of his pocket, and a sleeve of photos slide down. He leans over to show Amanda a picture of a Pitbull. “I am now doubly ready. What a good dog.” Amanda can’t help but smile at the beautiful dog, before her eyes strayed to the other photos in the sleeve. There was a really old wedding photo of what looks like a very young Robert with some blonde woman. Baby Val, Val as a child on her first bike, Val at her graduation, Mary and Robert at the bar, and a newer photo. It was of Robert and dad, wearing some cheesy t-shirts from the local ghost tour. Dad was giving a silly thumbs-up, and Robert had an arm around his shoulders. 

Robert pulls his wallet away after a moment, stuffing it back into his pocket and opening the car door. He carefully scoops up Rito and fumbles around with his keys. Amanda opens the door and only kind of stumbles on the way out. The water bottle full of vodka crinkles loudly as it hits the pavement, and rolls underneath the car. Amanda makes the mistake of getting on the ground to try and get it. It’s too far out of reach from this side of the truck, and Amanda can’t really remember how to stand. She hears the front door open, and then some more footsteps. And then Robert was kneeling down next to her. “Need some help, kid?” Amanda makes a noise in response, managing to roll over and give Robert her hands. He stands up and helps pull her to her feet. 

Amanda, with some help from Robert, manages to make it through the front door where Rito has been flopped over on the floor. “Betsy!!!” Amanda calls without hesitation, and suddenly there’s a lot of barking and the scrape of nails on the wood floor. Amanda braces for the sweet impact of doggy death, but nothing happens. Except she feels a dog jumping up her leg. She peeks an eye open, staring at the tiniest, dumbest looking boston terrier she had never seen. “I’m terrified.” She finally manages, and Robert chuckles behind her and closes the front door. Amanda does not hesitate to lay on the floor and allow Betsy to smell her and lick her face. “Take my life, tiny dog. Peel my flesh from my bones. I’m ready.”

Robert steps over Amanda carefully, walking past her to the kitchen. “Do you want anything to eat or drink?” He calls, and Amanda overhears the sound of a fridge being opened. “I… I have water, some milk, slightly expired orange juice, and I can make coffee.” 

“Pour me a glass of that OJ of questionable quality,” Amanda rolls onto her side as Betsy leaves her to investigate Rito. They sniff each other, before Rito pokes Betsy on the nose with a paw. “Humans do not deserve such beautiful creatures.” 

“Damn right we don’t,” Robert adds, setting the glass on the coffee table. Then turning to once again help Amanda to her feet. Once on the couch, Amanda takes a sip of the orange juice. It’s a little sour, but the citrus hits the spot. 

Amanda takes the time to take in her environment. It’s a little cleaner than expected. Okay, a lot cleaner. The first time dad talked about Robert’s place, he had described it as really, really messy. Taking in the living room, Amanda realized her bedroom was messier than this. Is that a recycling bin in the corner? “You recycle?” It’s a stupid question. Amanda is too drunk to realize it’s a stupid question. Of course the guy recycles. He has a recycling bin.

“Heh,” Robert muttered, taking a seat on the loveseat across the coffee table from the couch. “Your dad talked me into it. He’s been… Helping me tidy up. And reorganize. And… Yeah.”

The messiest part of the room is the coffee table, which has a few empty cups on it and an overflowing ash tray. Other than that, and a little bit of stray laundry, the place seemed pretty neat. There’s some photos over on the wall, mostly of Val. There’s one from the graduation party though, of Robert and Val. Did dad take that one? Amanda thinks so. “Is Val coming over to visit anytime soon?”

Robert pauses, and Amanda would normally pick up this being a touchy topic, but she was drunk. “Yeah. Next week, actually.” Robert seems like he’s going to stop there, but he suddenly keeps going. “She’s bringing her girlfriend. She wants us to meet.”

“I sooooo wanna hang out with her.” Amanda kicks her feet up on the coffee table, knocking over an empty cup. Betsy comes over and tries to bite it, but it’s too big for her little doggy mouth. She continues to try. Amanda is in love with this dog. “She’s so cool. Like? Everything she wears is awesome and her ideas are so cool and she’s so pretty.” Amanda huffs, finishing off the orange juice and watching the last few drops swirl around the bottom of the cup. “Don’t tell her, but I kind of have a huge crush on your daughter.”

Robert arches his brows softly at that, but then smiles. “Don’t tell him, but I kind of have a huge crush on your father.”

Amanda knew this already. At least, she suspected it. Dad and Robert had been hanging out a lot lately, and the way dad talked about him… It was all so weird. This was the first time her dad had dated since her father died, and Amanda almost felt overprotective of her father in a weird way. “Are you two… Dating?”

“No.”

“Why not? He likes you too.”

Robert seems to pause, and even through her drunken haze, she can see Robert is slightly uncomfortable. Amanda assumes he’s not going to get a reply at all after a long minute of silence, but he starts talking anyway. “We’re… On hold? Like. Fuck, okay, so I’m kind of… Really awful. Like, I’ve been this way for a long ass time and I’m trying to get better but… If I tried to date your dad right now, I’d undoubtedly fuck it up. It would be too soon and it would end badly, and I really, really like him, and don’t want to just… Chase him away like I did everyone else.” 

Amanda is sort of lost for words for a long moment. She hadn’t really expected an answer with any sort of… Decent weight behind it. “Wow,” she finally manages to say. “I, uh. Normally I’d be able to like. Get really real with you, dude, but. I’ve had a lot to drink. But uh… Thank you? I mean, for like, knowing you need to wait and letting my dad know that? Like… I just want him to be happy, y’know. And you seem to make him happy. Even if you guys are on hold or whatever.”

“You think I make him happy?” Robert looks genuinely surprised, and things seem to make a lot more sense to Amanda the more she talks to him. 

“Definitely. He talks about you a lot and always gets happy when you text him. I always thought it was kind of weird at first, because you’re like. The mysterious bad boy neighbor and my dad is... Dweeb of the century. I seriously didn’t understand why you guys even hung out. But… You’re like. You own the tiniest, silliest looking dog in the universe, and you carry pictures of your daughter everywhere, and you’ve been nervous this whole conversation. Like, it suddenly makes a lot of sense.” Amanda looks at Robert, who is watching her closely, hanging onto her words. “My dad has always… Been the type to just. Find the good in everyone. Even people who don’t see the good in themselves. I always worry that maybe he’s too nice but… I think you’ve proven yourself to be relatively harmless to my dad’s wellbeing.”

Robert looks… Relieved. The way his shoulders sag like he’d been tense this whole time. Amanda actually feels kinda bad for distrusting the guy in the first place. 

The next few minutes are very silent, which Amanda doesn’t mind too much. A glance at her phone tells her it’s almost four in the morning, and all of the nights exhaustion seems to be catching up to her all at once. When exactly she fell asleep, she wasn’t sure. Unconsciousness seemed to swallow her whole, and she was more than willing to let it consume her.

*****

As Amanda slips into consciousness, she groans loudly and pulls the blanket over her head. It’s way too bright in here, and her head is pounding. She takes a long few minutes just dreading her own existence. Once she felt like she wasn’t going to die the second she came in contact with light, she experimented a glance over the edge of the blanket. And… Where was she?

The blankets were a mauve color, and smelt a little stale. There were posters on the wall of bands Amanda hadn’t heard of in years. The closet was pretty empty, but there were still a few things crowding the furniture and collecting dust. It takes her a minute to recollect the night before, and decide that this is probably Val’s old room. 

She rolls over, and immediately regrets it. But there’s a tall trash can conveniently set next to the bed that Amanda spends the next ten minutes dry heaving into. Once that’s done, she carefully gets out of bed and into the hallway. It’s messier up here, laundry on the floor, and some old food wrappers. An empty beer can crunches under her foot as she accidentally steps on it, and she fumbles her way into the hall bathroom. After drinking an unreasonable amount of tap water (without a cup), Amanda feels slightly better. She wets some toilet paper and cleans up her makeup and smooths out her hair. 

Once she looks and feels a little more human, she heads back to Val’s room to curl up in bed with the trash can. Rito is on the pillow next to her, and she scratches along the cat’s spine for a few minutes between dry heaving and regretting all of her choices. 

She seems to drift off once again, because when she wakes back up she can smell food. Bacon, definitely. God, bacon smelt greasy and delicious. It takes all of her willpower, but Amanda manages to get up and head down the steps, trash can clung to her chest. Rito trails behind her. 

Robert was in the kitchen, with bedhead and wearing an apron. An actual apron. Amanda would laugh, but her head would hate her for it. “What time is it?”

“Noon.” Robert replies, poking some eggs around in a pan. “Coffee pot is over there. Just hit the button.”

Amanda does as she’s told, pausing to look at the machine. “You... Own a Keurig.” Robert shoots her a quick look, and she doesn’t reply. Robert owns a Keurig. And an apron. Amanda is trying her hardest not to laugh. The pain that shoots through her forehead helps her keep quiet. It takes all of ten seconds to brew an entire mug of coffee, and Amanda adds milk to it simply to cool it down. Once it’s no longer scalding, she downs half of it in two gulps. 

Robert finally comes over, placing a plate in front of her. “Seems you’re enjoying cuddle-buddy.” After Amanda gives a questioning look, Robert motions to the trash can. “I cannot tell you how many nights I’ve spent spooning that fuckin’ thing.”

“Yeah. Part of me is ready to scarf everything in front of me but part of me is terrified it’ll end up back in cuddle-buddy.” Amanda makes a face, picking up a strip of bacon and nibbling on it. Oh fuck it, she thinks as she shoves the whole strip into her mouth.

“Here,” Robert mutters as he moves to dig through the fridge. When he finishes, he has a pickle jar in his hand. This man is a genius. 

Soon there is a cup of pickle juice in front of Amanda that she is nursing between bites of food, and the sun doesn’t sting so bad anymore. “So…” She trails off, as Robert starts eating his own breakfast. “You let me steal a cat.”

“I didn’t let you. I just didn’t stop you.” He had a point. He pauses in the middle of eating when his phone buzzes, picking it up and beginning to type. “Your dad doesn’t know about the cat yet. I just told him you lost your key and crashed here.”

“He doesn’t need to know about the water bottle full of Grey Goose I lost under your truck.” Amanda mutters, finishing the greasy eggs on her plate. Robert totally cooked them in the bacon grease. He’s quickly becoming Amanda’s new favorite person. 

“Agreed. I would appreciate if you would get rid of that later, though.” He admits, making a face. “I’m… Trying to drink a lot less. Keeping it out of the house helps.”

“You got it my dude.” Amanda shoots him with some finger guns, before licking bacon grease off of her fingers. “Once I think my hand-eye coordination is capable of not making me eat concrete, I’ll crawl under there and get it.”

Robert’s phone buzzes again, and he looks to it. “Your dad is coming over. He was going to come over anyway, since he wants to help me clean my upstairs, but he put it off until you were awake.”

Before Amanda can respond, there’s a knock on the door. Robert leaves his food behind to go answer it. Amanda reaches off and snags a piece of bacon off his plate. This was it. Grease and pickle juice. The best remedy for a night of bad choices and emotional conversations with dad’s not-boyfriend.

Robert finally returns to the kitchen with dad in tow. He looks to Amanda and smiles, and Amanda gives him a little wave. “Hey pops. Hope I didn’t worry you too much.”

“You worried me a reasonable amount,” Dad responds before taking the third chair at Robert’s small kitchen table. He also steals a piece of bacon from Robert, and Robert pretends to stab at him with his fork. 

“So Robert says you lost your key?” Dad finally inquires, after retrieving some coffee from the hilariously out-of-character Keurig. 

“Yeah. I think somebody swiped my purse at the party last night.” Amanda shrugs, finishing off the last of her pickle juice. “They didn’t get anything important. My ID and my debit card and all that were in my wallet on me. They did get my favorite eyeliner, though.” Dammit. Amanda thought of the irony. Val thought it looked so good, and now it’s gone. She huffs, moving to lay her face on the table. “Dad.”

“Yeah?”

“I am very, very hungover.” Amanda admits, despite it being a little obvious. “So please don’t yell at me when I tell you this but… I may have stolen a cat last night.”

“You… Stole a cat?”

“It’s a really cute cat,” Robert adds, leaning down to feed said cat a piece of egg. Rito eagerly gobbles it up, before hopping up into Robert’s lap and getting into his plate. “Well, I guess I don’t need to eat ever. That’s okay.”

“Wow, that is a cute cat.” Dad mutters, leaning over to scratch its head. “But… How did you steal it? From where?”

“It was at the party last night. I hung out in the upstairs bathroom with it for a while. I had to save it from all the drunk teenagers.” Amanda finally raises her head to give Dad a grave look. “It was upstairs with all the couples who were making out. This poor cat was subjected to so much tongue last night. It was animal cruelty. I swear by it.”

Dad is silent for a moment, at a loss of what to say. “I… I should probably be mad, right? That’s what you do when your child steals an animal, right?” He huffs, looking back at Rito. “Panda, you know we have to give the cat back, right?”

“Nooooooooooo,” Amanda lets out a long whine that hurts her own head. “Rito is such a good cat, dad. They were totally on board with being catnapped and living in my dorm forever. Rito doesn’t want to go home.”

Dad was skeptical, but also Robert and the cat were getting cuddly and Amanda swore it was working in her favor. “Fine, okay. We’ll talk about this later. But know that I do not condone you abducting innocent cats from parties.”

“Well I don’t condone you telling me tiny boston terriers are actually Pitbulls.” Amanda retorts, causing a chuckle from both Robert and Dad. “It’s a sad stereotype that Pitbulls are scary. They’re adorable babies and deserve love like all dogs.”

“Did Robert show you the picture in his wallet?”

“Yes.”

“I knew he would.” Dad laughs, smiling and sipping his coffee. “Don’t let Betsy’s appearance fool you, Panda. She’s a bloodthirsty creature.”

“Robert and I already went over that.”

Dad pouts a bit, but then quickly smiles. “So, I take it you two got to talk a lot last night?” Amanda can see how important it is to him that the two of them get along. Robert looks at Amanda, not sure what she wanted to share.

“Yeah, we did. Robert fed me expired orange juice, and we talked about cat thievery, and the fact that I have a huge crush on his daughter.” 

“Wait, what?”

“Look, she likes my eyeliner. It could totally happen.”

**Author's Note:**

> do they ever return the cat? who knows.


End file.
